1.
Know your child. Parents fall short when
they try to make their children more intelligent, assertive, and graceful or
accomplished than they are naturally disposed to be. They fail them just as
much when they ignore or deny their real talents and temperament.
2.
Know yourself. Examine your motives in
wanting more from your child. Parents may have their own shame or unmet needs
that they project onto their children.
Do you want our child to take dance
lessons because your parents forced them on you? Were you a mediocre athlete
but hope for trophy in the next generation?
3.
Educate yourself. Talk to other parents
and your pediatrician, and read child-development books to learn what you can
reasonably except from your child at each stage of his life.
4. Empathize. Take time to see yourself through your
child’s eyes. Do you act embarrassed by him? Do you point out only his
mistakes? Would you want to be treated that way?
5. Make adjustments. “No one responds well to someone who
is accusatory or judgemental. If you find yourself harping on what your child
can’t do, refocus on her strengths. Once you change your attitude, you may find
that she changes too.
6. Collaborate. Create a partnership with your child
in which he can participate in setting appropriate goals and solving problems.
7. Read how your child feels. Your child’s behavior-
anger, fidgeting, procrastination- says a lot about whether she is being asked
to do more than she can manage.
8. Explore possibilities. A good way to encourage
I to expose your children to a variety of environments, including sports, the
arts, nature and science.
9. Keep your eye on the end goal. A parent’s main
objective should be to raise a child who loves well and takes pleasure in life.
You don’t want to stifle curiosity, initiative and confidence.
10. Avoid comparisons. A style of parenting
that works for one child may backfire for his sibling. Every child has his own
personality.
